Where the Sarah Things Are

Dear Denise,

I know you did not believe me when I said I would blog a monthly letter to you, but here I am. Writing you a letter. It will not happen monthly (notice I didn’t say it PROBABLY will not - I went straight to the will not), please try to console yourself before I see you next, as I don’t deal well with weeping.

This month? Is May, 2008. That is very exciting because May? Is right before June, July, August - aka summer. Woo! You know you are excited. Your favorite days ever happen in July, I remember! The 4th, and the 18th! Ha, yes. Extra brownie points for me please. Make sure they are served with ice cream.

I am not good at writing letters to you, I’m sorry! Pretty much everything I could tell you I already have via IM. So, maybe you won’t mind a recap? There won’t be a test. A pop quiz maybe, but no test.

On Friday night Jeff and I went to dinner with my work people. It was interesting. We went to a very fancy place (for us. Our idea of a big dinner out is Applebee’s.) that no one would ever have guessed existed where it exists. Apparently it is a 5-star establishment? In the middle of nowhere.

As you know, I am a very picky eater. Just call me whitebread. (But only in terms of my dietary preferences, okay? Thanks.) So fancy = panic/drama. I survived the evening, of course. And? I ATE A DUCK. I was a little worried that I would wake up the next day with webbed toes as a result, but deep down I must have known that was absurd. Or at least unlikely. Duck? Is not bad! It came with some weird wild rice thing though, and odd, flat little peas in their pods. I wasn’t a fan of either of those things. And then? I had chocolate cake for dessert. But - not just chocolate cake - it was DEATH BY CHOCOLATE cake. And it was yummy.

So yummy? That I ended up making my very own chocolate cake last night. Really, I have no idea if the two cakes are related at all, but the restaurant’s cake probably planted the seed. The cake I made? Is from a recipe that you shared with me a few weeks ago, saying something like “DAMN THIS LOOKS GOOD!” Here it is: Hershey’s “Perfectly Chocolate” Chocolate Cake. I printed that recipe because you were right. It did look good. Really, really good. And it is super good!

Mine is not as pretty as the cake on the site though. I didn’t feel up to washing the regular cake pan, so I used two round pans that were already clean and just waiting to be used. No problem! I’ve made round cakes before! But this cake is so moist and delicious that when I tried to remove them from their pans? They fell apart. So I mostly have a pile of delicious cake, that doesn’t really look all that cake like. Frosting that mess was interesting too (I didn’t make the frosting on that recipe, I just bought some to use). But hey - it’s just going in my tummy anyway, right? Right!

So yeah! That’s pretty much going to be my whole letter to you now. I hope you liked it a super lot! I hope it makes you feel all warm and tingly inside. Have a nice Monday!

Sincerely,
Sarah

(And hi to everyone else out there, too! I’m still alive.)

My poor kitty lost his manhood today. And now he’s spending the night at the vet’s. I miss him! And I’m sad/mad that he’s staying the night there to “make sure he doesn’t get a fever, and his sutures are okay” (like I’m sure someone is staying overnight at the Animal Hospital?! Whatever!) - when he could be here with me to take care of him! Poor kitty. I keep imagining him meowing into the darkness wondering where I am.

I know. I am pathetic and also depressing. And I want my kitty back!

I go home for lunch. And I usually watch the last 10 or so minutes of the news, and the first 10 or so minutes of Who Wants to be a Millionaire while I’m there. Yesterday one of the questions on Millionaire was something like:

Which natural disaster thingy below was not the subject of a top 40 song?
A) Heat Wave B) Hurricane
C) Tornado D) Landslide

I was thinking D. In my head I could hear “It’s like a HEAT WAVE! Burning in my heart!” and also “Here I am! Dun-nuh, Duh-nuh! Rock you like a HURRICANE!” But I couldn’t place the tornado or landslide songs… and landslide just seemed less likely. Luckily the guy actually playing knew there was a landslide song (but somehow not the other two! He used his 50/50. Sigh.), and it turns out there hasn’t been a top 40 song about a tornado.

So of course I had to write one! One of these days you will hear ME on your radio. And when you do - that guys answer will have been wrong. Because of course my song will be top 40! How could it not be?! This is what I’ve got so far:

I’m a TORNADO, baby!
I’m big and I’m bad and I’m sooo the boss of you!
I’ll huff and I’ll puff and I’ll blow your house down!
I’m a TORNADO!!!! I’ll wreck your ranch!
Oh what’s that in the sky - a cow! I made your cow go flying by!
WEEEEEE-yeahhhhh!!!! TORNADO!

Yeah. That’s a rock song. Lots of screaming. And at first “your ranch” was “you, bit**!” but Jeff pointed out that I couldn’t say that on the radio, and suggested your ranch. I liked it. It worked with the whole flying cow thing.

So it’s official – I’m destined for fame and fortune.

I have to kill 10 minutes. So I thought I’d post. And this is all that’s coming to mind.

I don’t like husbands that a) don’t listen - and then b) try to fudge their way through conversations about something they didn’t pay attention to instead of just admitting they zoned out. We women? We’re smart. We will figure it out.

I don’t like that Dale is so scared of his own shadow that he woke me up a skillion times last night by jumping on me and shaking in terror - all because the power went out a few times, and the re-setter thingy went CHIRP. By the sixth chirp you’d think he’d have gotten used to it right? Not so much.

I don’t like it when a friend doesn’t tell you about some major and sad event in her life - and then later when you ask an innocent question thats related to this sad thing your foot winds up in your mouth. And you really had no idea. How could you? She didn’t tell you!

I don’t like germs. And I don’t like being picked on when I do one of my weird things that I do to avoid germs. It’s not like I won’t touch doorknobs, or won’t use public restrooms… I just have little quirks regarding things that wind up in my mouth or near my face mostly. That’s not so weird. So there.

I’m sure there’s more, but that took nine minutes, so I am done now!

Happy April! As a lovely spring treat I’ve decided to sign up to post everyday in April! And the theme for this month is “letters”…. Odd, right? But I don’t have to try to use the theme everyday. Just here and there. Like now!

Dear Reader,
This post is my gift to you, for all that we have been through.
You stuck by me through my silence, and when I didn’t quite make sense.
You did all these things, and so to celebrate the dawning of spring, my gift to you is but a mere me sighting. Does it make your heart sing?
Well calm down my friend, for all things come to an end.
Including things that are good, and things you thought never could.
What I’m trying to say, if you read this today, is my dear… you’ve just been played.
Today… it’s April Fool’s Day.

Did you really think I would sign up to post every day when the suns finally started to come out? Sheesh.

Sincerely,
Me

PS I apologize for the crappy poem-age. Thats all I have in me. It’s sad. I know.

& Chewy … win some free soda.

moar funny pictures

moar funny pictures

Thanks for helping me pick a new image header - there was a tie! It was between number four and number seven - so I went ahead and decided between the two myself. Don’t worry, soon Spring should actually show up and I’ll find something new to use. Thanks again!

Step 1: Go here http://www.marcellusdesign.com/1234.htm

Step 2: Come back here and post a comment with your choice.

Step 3: Carry on as usual.

I’m thinking that this Saturday will be the deadline, so I can actually change it soon. Or sooner. I reserve that right.

Votes so far:
#1 - 1 votes, #2 - 2 votes, #3 - 0 votes
#4 - 5 votes, #5 - 2 votes, #6 - 1 votes
#7 - 5 votes, #8 - 0 votes, #9 - 2 votes

We went and saw Horton Hears a Who on Saturday, and left feeling kind of old. There were an overwhelming amount of not-quite-school-aged kids in the theater, and we were without a doubt the oldest people there without kids. And really, we might just have been the oldest people there - period. Sad, right? I thought so too.

Luckily, the movie was pretty cute.

I’ve been drinking a lot of grape soda lately, and that got me wondering…. how did orange soda become so mainstream, and poor grape get left behind? That’s not very nice, if you ask me.

Stupid egotistical orange soda. I’ll choose grape over you every time.

I love you grape.